[sbk]

Saw a young Thai man wearing one of those small purse type bags with the long string for a strap. Not exactly super feminine but not the most masculine of things either.

I love the fact that men here are sure of who they are, there is no masculine posturing, macho attitude trying to prove how male they are. No fear of appearing "feminine" because these are people who are sure of their own sexuality. Either you are homosexual or you are not, and as my husband once said, "This isn't America you know, just because your friend is gay doesn't mean everyone thinks you are too". There is no "pink is for girls, blue is for boys", pink is just a color, and if you like it, you wear it. Men can walk around wearing their wives sarongs, put their arms around another man and not even think twice about it (and neither does anyone else). I love the fact that the Thai man has nothing to prove to anyone and is confident in himself.

[Dutchy]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 11:05:33, said:

No fear of appearing "feminine" because these are people who are sure of their own sexuality.

A refreshing new post, it's actually the first time ever I've seen a line like this...


I nevertheless doubt the validity of this statement, Thai men do not seem to be that sure about their own sexuality as Thailand boasts the highest number of ladyboys in the world...

Why this is so, is another question... but the fact is there...

Dutchy

[Khun Larry]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 04:05:33, said:

Thai man has nothing to prove to anyone and is confident in himself.

I can't imagine what your talking about.

[Bad News]

sbk..You love in a man what makes you comfortable.
You do not love Thai men, you love what doesn't threaten
you with robust sexual manliness.

In other words, you like Michael Jackson cd's
are charmed by Hugh Grant, until he did that awful thing in the car
and you think Madona is too...too...well, too much like a guy.

"I love the fact that the Thai man has nothing to prove to anyone
and is confident in himself."

Yeh, that high rate of spousal abuse is fiction
just designed to make farang feel superior.

[Boo]

Amazing isn't it, all the farang guys can post how fabulous thai women are, how much better they are than us farang girls, how they have a better attitude, looks, etc but as soon as one of us tries to post something similar, some guys have to come out of the woodwork & slag her off.

Personally, I disagree with the lack of masculinity bit, my hubbies one of the most manly men I have ever met, he is a near neanderthal in his hygiene & fashion sense, wouldn't be seen dead in anything other than denim blue or black (I once bought him a dark red golf shirt, it's still in the packet!) & his views about a womans role are only saved by his ability to cook & take out the rubbish (two things I hate). But, I wouldn't swap him for a farang guy, or any other for that matter, but thats my personal choice, cause I love him, warts & all.

As a moderator on this forum, I really have to try hard to differentiate between a constuctive comment or observation which is someones personal choice & the mysoganists who like to slag people off, but I relaly have no problem, editing the posts that do offend. So bear that in mind.

[sbk]

Dutchy, on Mon 2004-05-10, 11:59:58, said:

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 11:05:33, said:

No fear of appearing "feminine" because these are people who are sure of their own sexuality.

A refreshing new post, it's actually the first time ever I've seen a line like this...


I nevertheless doubt the validity of this statement, Thai men do not seem to be that sure about their own sexuality as Thailand boasts the highest number of ladyboys in the world...

Why this is so, is another question... but the fact is there...

Dutchy

Actually Dutchy, if you read the whole post you would see I had addressed this issue. Either you are a man or you're not. If you're not, then you are a ladyboy. Simple as that, but there are no judgements on men who don't appear to be completely "masculine" like you would get from western men, including, so it would seem, 'badnews' who doesn't hesitate to make a judgement call on me, my husband and all thai men in general. Despite the fact that he knows nothing about me, my husband, and clearly not much about Thai men in general

So, just to answer your 'charges'

sbk..You love in a man what makes you comfortable.
You do not love Thai men, you love what doesn't threaten
you with robust sexual manliness.

My husband is 5'10 and over 180 pounds, hardly an airy, fairy type. He can fish all day, get coconuts all day. I would say he is very robustly sexual and manly. And I guess, you could say, after being married to him 15 years, I do love Thai men.

In other words, you like Michael Jackson cd's

can't stand 'im, personally, I like Linkin Park


are charmed by Hugh Grant, until he did that awful thing in the car

Frankly I am more of a Brad Pitt fan

and you think Madona is too...too...well, too much like a guy.

actually, I think Madonna is free to be herself and think she is a model of female empowerment that scares the heck out of most guys.

"I love the fact that the Thai man has nothing to prove to anyone
and is confident in himself."

Yeh, that high rate of spousal abuse is fiction
just designed to make farang feel superior.

As compared to the low rate of spousal abuse in the west??

Sorry Badnews, next time you feel the need to make broad sweeping statements try another forum.

And boo, right on sister

[sbk]

chingy, on Mon 2004-05-10, 15:42:23, said:

this post is funny, i read it to my gf and she crack laughting, oh! man so fresh so innocent, maybe one day.
YOU WANT THE TRUTH, YOU WANT THE TRUTH
YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH.

well, chingy, I have to say, you have made my day too. It's been awhile since I have been called fresh and innocent.

And as for the may be one day, well, I would guess that after being married 15 years I pretty much already KNOW THE TRUTH!!

And chingy, just as an FYI, there are good thai men around, they are just already taken, that's why the the rest of the girls settle for farang men

[Bluecat]

Boo, on Mon 2004-05-10, 14:19:50, said:

Amazing isn't it, all the farang guys can post how fabulous thai women are, how much better they are than us farang girls, how they have a better attitude, looks, etc but as soon as one of us tries to post something similar, some guys have to come out of the woodwork & slag her off.

You see, Boo, a few more topics like this one and I won't have to post here anymore to keep it running,...
I personnally have no particular comment on the question, I do not live with a Thai man and the ones I go out with did not strike me as being very different than the farangs I usually go out with,...
But I agree that men showing a feminine side up to the extreme (ladyboys) don't seem to be subject to the same prejudices than in the west.
Is it because the Thai men are sure of their sexuality?
I do not know. Maybe the Thai girls are feminine enough not to make them doubt of their sexuality,... (could not resist it)

[sbk]

Possibly Bluecat , but I suspect it has more to do with the culture.

I didn't say men show their feminine side more, just that they don't perceive "femininity' in the same way western men do, ie pink is for girls, boys cannot carry a bag. I know many men who think nothing of putting their arm around a good male friend, I have seen men weep for a lost loved one, men who put on their wife's sarong to run out to bail out their fishing boat because its handy. And there is none of the ribbing or ridicule that would occur among western men.

Also, my point was Thai men don't seem to have that need to show off their masculinity in a macho way like many western men do. Not because they are effeminate or because they are ladyboys, simply because, in this culture, most people are quite aware of their sexuality and embrace it. Be it hetero or homosexuality. And they are not judged for the sexuality they choose. Roles are very openly defined in this society, be it either the man's role, women's or ladyboy's. And by 'role' I mean one's behavior in society.

[Boo]

Quote

Bluecat...
I do not know. Maybe the Thai girls are feminine enough not to make them doubt of their sexuality,... (could not resist it) 

[Bluecat]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 16:42:14, said:

Roles are very openly defined in this society, be it either the man's role, women's or ladyboy's. And by 'role' I mean one's behavior in society.

Very good point indeed, sbk.
Where is Yohan?
I'd love his input here.
Problem is, when he starts, he can not stop, so better keep him away,...

[sbk]

Too true bluecat. And besides, I think his idea of a radical feminist is one who thinks women should vote

[Bluecat]

Boo, on Mon 2004-05-10, 17:49:17, said:

Quote

Bluecat...
I do not know. Maybe the Thai girls are feminine enough not to make them doubt of their sexuality,... (could not resist it) 

Are you talking to me, Boo?

[inan]

Quote

Amazing isn't it, all the farang guys can post how fabulous thai women are, how much better they are than us farang girls, how they have a better attitude, looks, etc but as soon as one of us tries to post something similar, some guys have to come out of the woodwork & slag her off.

I agree!! It's funny to read all the generalisations farang guys can make about farang girls. We're all fat, ugly, white, bitter, over-confident yet secretly insecure feminists... too busy chasing careers and worrying about equality to worry about pleasing our men. In fact the only reason girls like us end up with Thai guys is because we can't get a farang! Surely it can't be because we actually prefer Thai men? Nah, too far fetched to be true

What do I love about my man? He's not fat, white or hairy I have never liked big or hairy guys so Asian men suit me fine. I love his cooking, his intelligence, his curiosity, his loyalty to his family, his loyalty to me and his lovely, thick, black hair.

Of course there is an equally long list of all the things about him that drive me mad...

[the gentleman]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 11:05:33, said:

Saw a young Thai man wearing one of those small purse type bags with the long string for a strap. Not exactly super feminine but not the most masculine of things either.

I love the fact that men here are sure of who they are, there is no masculine posturing, macho attitude trying to prove how male they are. No fear of appearing "feminine" because these are people who are sure of their own sexuality. Either you are homosexual or you are not, and as my husband once said, "This isn't America you know, just because your friend is gay doesn't mean everyone thinks you are too". There is no "pink is for girls, blue is for boys", pink is just a color, and if you like it, you wear it. Men can walk around wearing their wives sarongs, put their arms around another man and not even think twice about it (and neither does anyone else). I love the fact that the Thai man has nothing to prove to anyone and is confident in himself.

I agree with half of it SBK, I just dont know which half

[Khun Larry]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 04:05:33, said:

Saw a young Thai man wearing one of those small purse type bags with the long string for a strap. Not exactly super feminine but not the most masculine of things either.

Don't miss your chance. The competition between farang women for this Thai guy must be fierce

At least it provides an option for some male companionship in LOS

Would love to know if you can get him a visa

Chookdee

[Boo]

Quote

Khun Larry Posted on Mon 2004-05-10, 19:33:56
  QUOTE (sbk @ Mon 2004-05-10, 04:05:33)
Saw a young Thai man wearing one of those small purse type bags with the long string for a strap. Not exactly super feminine but not the most masculine of things either.



Don't miss your chance. The competition between farang women for this Thai guy must be fierce   

At least it provides an option for some male companionship in LOS

Would love to know if you can get him a visa

Chookdee

LOL, isn't that what they call "metrosexual"!

[sbk]

Actually it wasn't a particularly feminine bag, just the fact that 1) he could have cared less what others think and 2) that other Thai men could have cared less as well. The guy wasn't very effeminate or feminine in any other way except for this little bag.

'Course David Beckham wore a skirt but nobody called him a ladyboy, hmmm???

Metrosexual sounds a bit too sophisticated for the parts I live in. I think he was just a guy who had a lot of stuff and saw the usefulness of a bag.

Guys, next time you want us to carry your stuff in our purses, think about getting one of these for yourself.

[Dutchy]

sbk, on Mon 2004-05-10, 15:27:52, said:

My husband is 5'10 and over 180 pounds, hardly an airy, fairy type. He can fish all day, get coconuts all day. I would say he is very robustly sexual and manly. And I guess, you could say, after being married to him 15 years, I do love Thai men.

Hmm get coconuts all day...? You have a leash around his neck and send him in the coconut tree? .... You also pay him peanuts.....?

No offense, everybody what they like but I found your posting very humorous. I never actually imagined that anyone could say something like that, but we're all happy for you...

Dutchy

[sbk]

Dutchy, clearly you don't live out in coconut country. Here, they use a long bamboo stick, (to get to the tops of the highest trees they lash them together) at the end of the stick is a large metal hook. The person doing coconuts stands holding the end of the stick looking up the tree, hooks the coconut and pulls. And then prays that only one falls at a time. Try holding a 3-5m bamboo pole, craning your neck and dodging coconuts for more than an hour.

glad to keep you amused, maybe it will help you keep an open mind too.

And Chingy, are you implying that the majority of Thai men live in Bangkok and they are somehow the role model for all men in the rest of the country???

And guys, hate to tell you this, but all your pointless snide remarks have just proven my point, when I showed my husband the ridiculous posting

Quote

You do not love Thai men, you love what doesn't threaten
you with robust sexual manliness.

he just laughed. And when pointed out the guy with the bag he just made your usual guy grunting noise along the lines of "women! make a big deal out of something that's not, like usual"

At no time did he feel the need to insult or demean anyone. Wonder why that is?

[taxexile]

Quote

At no time did he feel the need to insult or demean anyone. Wonder why that is?

possibly because your husband does not come from a society that for the past thirty years has inadvertantly increased the enmity and competition between men and women. pitted women against men and vice versa instead of putting the different abilities and skills of men and women to good use in a complementary way.

the snide remarks,insults even, that the postings over the past few weeks on various topics,have been made towards women by men,and by women towards men are i'm sure a result of these changes in attitudes and muddling of roles.

[Dutchy]

[quote name='sbk' date='Tue 2004-05-11, 18:38:35']You do not love Thai men, you love what doesn't threaten
you with robust sexual manliness.[/quote] he just laughed. And when pointed out the guy with the bag he just made your usual guy grunting noise along the lines of "women! make a big deal out of something that's not, like usual"

At no time did he feel the need to insult or demean anyone. Wonder why that is? [/quote]
Thanks for the lecture on how to get coconuts out of a tree but I prefer other beings doing that for me.

Let me guess, your husband votes for Thai Rak Thai or will vote for TRT after everything you showed him from this message board?

Dutchy

PS and for the last question, let your hubby explain the meaning of the word "demean," that'll explain it all...

[sbk]

Good point tax, nice to see an intelligent, thought-out response. Although sometimes I wonder how inadvertant it is.

At it again dutchy? Nope, my husband doesn't like TRT at all, besides he is a southerner, they mostly vote democrat. And dutchy, here you go, found a photo that explains it all (not my husband, he has a much better technique than this guy ) And to be honest, my husband would rather someone else did it too