Posted 2009-11-06 16:37:37
Quote The topic is about the conviction of the wife and her lover. Please stay on topic.
I still think it is relevant to offer advice to other falang on how to avoid the same fate.
Briefly, don't paint a target on your shirt.
1) Don't buy a large amount of life insurance for yourself (as 'security' for the spouse). That's like signing your own death warrant.
2) Don't give the impression you have spent all your life's money on houses, land, vehicles, machinery, education, buffaloes, etc.
In sum, try to convince your beloved that you are worth more alive than dead....
Always observe Rule 1: "Never invest more in Thailand that you are prepared to walk away from."
And if it all goes pear-shaped, get out of town on the next stagecoach.
Edited by RickBradford, 2009-11-06 16:40:33.
Posted 2009-11-06 17:02:38
 bkkjames, on 2009-11-06 16:22:46, said:
Ga-gai, on 2009-11-06 16:08:31, said: There you have it! Another example of what marry-for-money will end up like.
Marrying bar-girls to whom you could be their father or even grandfather, always comes at a price. That fact that this is very common, is not a surprise. But the amazing thing is how surprised they get, when they realize that their beloved wife doesn't love him. As long as the oldies really understand this fact, they wouldn't get any surprises.
Interesting generalization. I knew a young guy early 20's who was dating a girl in his office. Unknown to him was she was somebody's mia noi. Walked out of his apartment one night and was hit in the back of the head by a guy with a metal bar.
Died a few weeks later in hospital. Did he deserve it?
Yepp! That's how it works. Even if there would be 2 females on every 1 male in town, you can be sure that there aren't any single women available. 1 Thai male could have 1-2-3 or more Mea Noi's and he wouldn't hesitate to kill that guy who dare to try to steal any of his chick's. The only reason the Mea Noi's stay with that guy, is purely for the economy. Not for the love. Who's to blame for this Mea Noi culture? The male or his flock of chicks? Both of course. So, it's purely about the money. Marrying a 20-30 year younger woman, doesn't make the love more genuine.
Posted 2009-11-06 17:14:36
I have never done this before, but looking back at my previous post, I was off topic (which is not uncommon for me) and my post was rather insensitive, so I do apologize. I am glad that justice was served in this case, and my heart goes out to his family.
Posted 2009-11-07 08:20:19
IanForbes, on 2009-11-06 02:12:20, said: With that I agree, Sassienie. Unfortunately, men seldom think with the proper head when it comes to pretty ladies. I see nothing wrong with setting some lovely lady up in a nice home and taking care of her, but don't fall for the marriage thing. Just think of it as a gift, or some sort of charity... because that is all it is. I'm glad that justice has finally been served in this case. It shows the Thai court system isn't all bad. It certainly isn't any worse than what we have in Canada.
I have little confidence these individuals will spend the remainder of life behind bars in Thailand. How often have we heard/read some finalization to only see it "untied" later on. BTY what ever happened to all the other investigations we have read a/b on TV e.g. Eckomai night club fire etc.
Sorry I don't have much faith in what I hear from Thai officials/police etc.
K
Posted 2009-11-07 08:48:15
RickBradford, on 2009-11-06 16:37:37, said: Quote The topic is about the conviction of the wife and her lover. Please stay on topic.
I still think it is relevant to offer advice to other falang on how to avoid the same fate.
Briefly, don't paint a target on your shirt.
1) Don't buy a large amount of life insurance for yourself (as 'security' for the spouse). That's like signing your own death warrant.
2) Don't give the impression you have spent all your life's money on houses, land, vehicles, machinery, education, buffaloes, etc.
In sum, try to convince your beloved that you are worth more alive than dead....
Always observe Rule 1: "Never invest more in Thailand that you are prepared to walk away from."
And if it all goes pear-shaped, get out of town on the next stagecoach.
I agree. Your point is an excellent generalisation
But the quote you have given was presumably reiterating a point I made earlier in the thread that posters were attacking the deceased's position on a personal level. Some posters were being incredibly insensitive and should really think before they post. But the mods can't be everywhere thouigh I note they have now deleted some posts
Posted 2009-11-08 11:36:35
The country is full of young women lining up to marry elderly farang men. These women who marry men 30 or 40 yrs older than them are not marrying for love it is the financial benifits when he drops off the perch. They normally only know the men for a couple of weeks before convincing him to sign the marriage papers.
Posted 2009-11-08 11:50:51
So many generalizations,i too have been married to a british girl 18 years younger than me it lasted 12 years and ended amicably,my present wife is Thai she is 24 years younger than me ,we have a son of 16 and spend most off our time together ,still best friends and lovers and her greatest worry is that i will die before her.
Posted 2009-11-08 11:59:28
thaimate, on 2009-11-08 11:50:51, said: So many generalizations,i too have been married to a british girl 18 years younger than me it lasted 12 years and ended amicably,my present wife is Thai she is 24 years younger than me ,we have a son of 16 and spend most off our time together ,still best friends and lovers and her greatest worry is that i will die before her.
I hope you live a long time and don't drink to excess or smoke..to be fair to your wife 24 years your junior
Posted 2009-11-08 13:24:36
RickBradford, on 2009-11-06 16:37:37, said: In sum, try to convince your beloved that you are worth more alive than dead....
How romantic. 
Posted 2009-11-08 13:36:56
RickBradford, on 2009-11-06 16:37:37, said: Quote The topic is about the conviction of the wife and her lover. Please stay on topic.
I still think it is relevant to offer advice to other falang on how to avoid the same fate.
Briefly, don't paint a target on your shirt.
1) Don't buy a large amount of life insurance for yourself (as 'security' for the spouse). That's like signing your own death warrant.
2) Don't give the impression you have spent all your life's money on houses, land, vehicles, machinery, education, buffaloes, etc.
In sum, try to convince your beloved that you are worth more alive than dead....
Always observe Rule 1: "Never invest more in Thailand that you are prepared to walk away from."
And if it all goes pear-shaped, get out of town on the next stagecoach.
If you think like that then it would probably be better not to get into a relationship.
Relationships consist of trust. Occasionally this trust is misplaced and things go wrong. Sometimes others misplace their trust in us too. Sometimes things go wrong in a very bad way as in this case and my sympathies go out to the family and it is good justice has been done. However, these kind of realtionships tend to be in the minority and no overall genaralization should be made especially in a racially/nationality stereotyping way.
Posted 2009-11-08 13:46:51
bkkjames, on 2009-11-06 16:22:46, said: Ga-gai, on 2009-11-06 16:08:31, said: There you have it! Another example of what marry-for-money will end up like.
Marrying bar-girls to whom you could be their father or even grandfather, always comes at a price. That fact that this is very common, is not a surprise. But the amazing thing is how surprised they get, when they realize that their beloved wife doesn't love him. As long as the oldies really understand this fact, they wouldn't get any surprises.
Interesting generalization. I knew a young guy early 20's who was dating a girl in his office. Unknown to him was she was somebody's mia noi. Walked out of his apartment one night and was hit in the back of the head by a guy with a metal bar.
Died a few weeks later in hospital. Did he deserve it?
Perhaps there are those who might retort," Sum num na".
I'd rather not. Sounds like another trajedy befalling the "ill-informed".
If you don't know what ur getting into, its hard to prepare for the possible outcomes. That stands for getting into relationships at any level but pertaining to the post, (staying on topic) it also counts for conspiricy to commit a fellony.
One hopes such people are only released in a wooden box. But who knows... maybe the hat will get passed around and they'll be out, older and hopefully wiser...
Get enough knowledge and you'll cease to be amazed... Then you just have to decide if you like it enough to stay... Simple. (NOT to be confused with EASY).
Edited by Loz, 2009-11-08 13:54:54.
#37
brahmburgers
Posted 2009-11-08 14:04:38
my two satang worth:
I've met a lot of farang with their younger Thai mates in toe. Sometimes the lady looks like she cares for the guy, sometimes not. But if she's dead-eyed & cold hearted, the guy can't tell. He's too jazzed in the idea that a girl younger than his daughter can be sexually open to him, and act like a girlfriend (but only if he keeps attending to his ATM duties).
Advice to Brits and any other farang: Don't be so doggone nice! Don't act like you're dealing with porcelein china dolls and have to as sweet as a grandma out with frail toddlers. Be real! If you act like a man, the woman will respond accordingly. If you act like a sissy too-eager-to-please milchtoast, then expect to get messed up. Don't only stiffen your pecker, stiffen your spine also.
Posted 2009-11-08 14:14:17
It's all about the money? A beautiful woman who marries a bum with no money would obviously have been shorted in the brains department. A stupid woman marrying a bum is a good match. They can starve together.
That said, any older man who puts his life savings in the control of his wife is also asking for trouble. The standard Thai Visa saying, not to spend more than you can afford to walk away from is unfortunately very true.
Posted 2009-11-08 14:14:55
The saddest part is out of all the westerners I know who've been stiffed by their wives/girlfriends when I hear the news I haven't been in the least surprised.
Posted 2009-11-08 14:26:10
Maybe there is a special on the arrivals gate:
"Rose tinted specs - Free with every false smile flashed your way!"
Posted 2009-11-08 14:31:23
One week trial doesn't feel very thorough. But then again: This is Thailand. Important is only that they did it, then they deserve it!
Posted 2009-11-08 18:04:08
joorakee, on 2009-11-06 04:44:27, said: sassienie, on 2009-11-05 20:03:25, said: If you are a guy and you marry or have a lady friend who is 20 to 30 years or more younger than you, than it`s not love, SHE ONLY WANTS YOUR MONEY.
I believe that there can be love between a 45-year-old guy and a 25-year-old girl as well as I believe that there can be no love between spouses of the same age. Of course, I am aware that many (most?) marriages have more to do with money than with feelings and the financial status (mainly of the male) is one of the most important factors (no matter in which part of the world).
[']
there is a difference between marry for sex or for love. Age is less a obstacle in the field of love, I love my grandmother dearly but please no sex. The case hear has nothing to do with the age gap, it has to do with people that find new love and want not to loose the relative wealth that they have obtained. Sad story that finally came to an end with a conviction
Posted 2009-11-08 18:10:32
marsteele, on 2009-11-08 05:36:35, said: The country is full of young women lining up to marry elderly farang men. These women who marry men 30 or 40 yrs older than them are not marrying for love it is the financial benifits when he drops off the perch. They normally only know the men for a couple of weeks before convincing him to sign the marriage papers.
They marry for financial stability and a better quality in life. Not for what will be coming when he dies. Mostly the men want to marry as they want to show of their young bride. Again this is not the matter in this case. She found someone else and did not want to give up the better quality in life as far as I can see it
Posted 2009-11-08 18:15:32
ralphlsasser, on 2009-11-06 15:03:37, said: Could these two possibly get out on parole? They need to rot in prison.
It is possible but the fact that they were convicted so easily and quickly implies that they don't have influential connections and didn't have a good legal team. So they will probably be left to rot. A life sentence counts as 50 years for parole. So I think they would have to serve a third of that even to be eligible. By then they will be in their 60s and in poor health, if they have survived 16 years in a Thai prison.
Posted 2009-11-08 18:45:22
joorakee, on 2009-11-06 11:44:27, said: sassienie, on 2009-11-05 20:03:25, said: If you are a guy and you marry or have a lady friend who is 20 to 30 years or more younger than you, than it`s not love, SHE ONLY WANTS YOUR MONEY.
I believe that there can be love between a 45-year-old guy and a 25-year-old girl as well as I believe that there can be no love between spouses of the same age. Of course, I am aware that many (most?) marriages have more to do with money than with feelings and the financial status (mainly of the male) is one of the most important factors (no matter in which part of the world).
So maybe it is most safe to stay single all our lives long.
Let the victim rest in peace. [']
I am 20 yrs older than my beautiful Thai wife and money was/is not a factor in OUR 10 year marriage.
I consider myself very lucky and generally agree that $$$ can make a difference in ANY relationship- why should Khon Thai react differently than the rest of this dosh-oriented world.
rgdz, Brewsta
Posted 2009-11-08 21:34:13
Very, very sad! No way for the old boy to go. RIP
Posted 2009-11-09 01:15:07
caf, on 2009-11-06 07:51:01, said: Daewoo, on 2009-11-06 07:06:32, said: all over the world, husbands murder wives, and wives murder husbands when they meet someone new, and want to take all the spoils of their marriage with them.
This is far from unique to Thailand or marriages with large age gaps.
No matter how many times you write 'no disrespect', implying the man is stupid is disrespectful.
Daewoo.
I agree with your last sentence. Some of these posts should not have been posted; or removed by the mods. The thread is about a death and a murder convistion . Not about how we view certain farang - thai marriages
RIP FARANG,GOOD TO READ THERE IS JUSTICE IN THAILAND.IT JUST SHOWS YOU GOT TO BE CAREFUL ESPECIALLY IN THAILAND,YES IT GOES ON ALL OVER THE WORLD,ALL THE TIME YEAR IN AND OUT,FARANGS/FORIEGNERS ARE LOOKED AT LIKE MONEY BAGS,THIS IS NOTHING TO DO WITH RESPECT OR STUPIDITY BUT GREED,  AFTER ALL LOVE IS BLIND TO MANY BUT SOME MARRIAGES WORKOUT NOT ALL!!!
Edited by michael233, 2009-11-09 01:15:53.
Posted 2009-11-09 01:34:42
What is not good to look at are your capital letters, looks like you are shouting.
And your shouting sounds as bad as your silly post.
Posted 2009-11-09 02:24:56
soihok, on 2009-11-09 01:34:42, said: What is not good to look at are your capital letters, looks like you are shouting.
And your shouting sounds as bad as your silly post.
Is that all you can do is to critizise,i dont think my post silly at all i've been married to 2 thais and my 2nd wife is the best not for money,i write from experience,not like your fiction book notes are stupid!!!!!!!!
I wonder what happened to the farang mans guest house etc,does all that go to the thai-wife family or thai goverment???not so naive!
Edited by michael233, 2009-11-09 02:31:57.
Posted 2009-11-09 02:33:48
sedeflonga, on 2009-11-08 14:31:23, said: One week trial doesn't feel very thorough. But then again: This is Thailand. Important is only that they did it, then they deserve it!
If this is the case I think it is, the deceased wrote a letter to his lawyer explaining the situation shortly before he was killed. That document would have been a material document in court substantiated by eye witness accounts and other evidence gathered. It would seem it was an open and close case with all the evidence at hand.
Lord knows how he must have suffered during those final hours. RIP.
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