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thegovernor

Thai Jokes

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My wife has been telling me quite a few (Thai) jokes lately and none of them made me laugh in the slightest,which got me thinking that all the jokes she has ever told me have never been funny,(for me anyway) maybe its all lost in the translation,mind you she doesn't think my jokes are any good either,so does ayeone have a funny Thai joke? there must be some funny ones out there,.....cheesy.gif Merry Christmas to all........The Governor.

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My wife has been telling me quite a few (Thai) jokes lately and none of them made me laugh in the slightest,which got me thinking that all the jokes she has ever told me have never been funny,(for me anyway) maybe its all lost in the translation,mind you she doesn't think my jokes are any good either,so does ayeone have a funny Thai joke? there must be some funny ones out there,.....cheesy.gif Merry Christmas to all........The Governor.

Excuse my Thai Gov, when I get up and go for a slash, " stangle the python" "shake hands with the vicar" etc etc, she says "bai ying kra dai", like i said excuse my Thai but that's what it sounds like, it means " going to shoot the rabbit", hey ho it's a strange world.

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I suspect they have a few Jokes about us Farangs. Especially the Stateless, Feckless and Feral Farangi I've been reading about in the Flower show thread

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From my Thai Flash Cards email today.

ฉันชอบกินกระเทียมมาก ถึงแม้ฉันจะไม่เหลือเพื่อนเลยก็ตาม

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แม่ของคุณหนูแฮมสเตอร์และคุณพ่อของคุณมีกลิ่นของ elderberries

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Not to get philosophical or anything, but....most jokes need a butt. Something or more usually....someone is the butt of the joke. I find most jokes do not cross borders...anywhere. Some friends and I were sitting around talking about jokes and I asked my German friend...What is the other German word for bra? I replied...stop-em-bof-from-floppin....he wasn't offended, but did not see any humor in it at all. It is difficult to find one size that fits all. A lady walks in a bar with a duck under her arm....bartender says, " That's a nice pig you have there." She said, "Fool, it's a duck!" Bartender says..."I was talking to the duck!" Humorous? As long as you don't ask a lady perhaps. Personally I don't mind if a joke offends someone...I try and have enough sense to not tell it to anyone that it might offend...but, that is the price you pay trying to be funny. Father walks in on his son and says..."Son, if you don't stop that, you will go blind." Son replies, "I'm over here, Dad!"

Humor is probably one of the best medicines in the world....I think cartoons, think visual here....can be the least offending (thanks to PC and the man who originally coined the term....Mao Tse-tung) and perhaps the funnier of any media you can translate humor with. Gary Larson was a genius at this. Example...if you don't know about Calvin and Hobbs...then Watterson's humor would be lost on you.

So, as we say in some parts of the world....Joke' em if they can't take a <deleted>. PP

post-131521-0-29848200-1325036102_thumb. post-131521-0-47493000-1325036162_thumb.

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Watterson's humour is never lost on me, I have his full collection hidden away in the murky depths of my PC.

"I asked mom if I was a gifted child... she said they certainly wouldn't have PAID for me".

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As it is the season of goodwill I will share my favourite "Thai joke" which I believe I personally came up with although I hereby waive any rights to royalties or compensation from anybody who wants to repeat it.

STARTS

Why are Thai cats so skinny?

Because whenever people try to give them food they say Mai-ow

ENDS

Thank you.

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The Farang visited his doctor because he heard voices, saw things that were not there etc.

The doctor examined him, x-rays of his head etc etc.

Then he said to the Farang:

I have finally discovered what is wrong with your brain:

On the left side, there is nothing right and on the right side,

there is nothing left!

blink.png w00t.gif crazy.gif

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Not what you're looking for, I know, but:

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner, a New Englander, and a Californian)an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47 Africans walk into a fine restaurant....

"I'm sorry," said the maître d', after he had scrutinized the group one by one and barred their entrance saying....

"You can't come in here without a Thai."

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As it is the season of goodwill I will share my favourite "Thai joke" which I believe I personally came up with although I hereby waive any rights to royalties or compensation from anybody who wants to repeat it.

STARTS

Why are Thai cats so skinny?

Because whenever people try to give them food they say Mai-ow

ENDS

Thank you.

Haha, not bad. I am sure that would go down well with Thais

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