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[jay6999]

i supported my tg thru her pregnancy. the first five months of the child's life i supported the child. i now find-out, i'm not the father!!
she is Thai. i am American. anything i can do? do i have any recourse to get my money back?? can i return the favor?? thanks....

[cdnvic]

There was ample time to test paternity previously so you probably have no recourse. If you care nothing for either of them your only recourse is to cut your losses and go.

Have you done a DNA test or are you going on her word alone? If there haven't been any tests done, get them done to avoid a situation where you abandon a child that really is yours, just because a woman who wanted to get rid of you told you it wasn't.

[IanTheGeek]

I am sure you could take here to court in Thailand, but unless you gave her a fortune it would cost you more and the time it would take is years.

[TheWalkingMan]

That money is gone and you should walk away.  I cannot seen any upside in trying to get the cash back.  You could ask, but I doubt even if she would pass you 50 baht.

[ludditeman]

What money!
Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

[beano2274]

Did she mean you are not the father cause she was with someone else?
or
Under Thai law you are not the father cause you haven't married her, thus pushing you into marriage?


either way the money has gone.

[2unique]

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 07:57:35, said:

What money!
Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

Hahahahaha I'm laughing otherwise I'd be crying as I look back on the emotional, mental and financial drain on resources! Sure if you leave the kid naked in a drawer drinking water but a vaccinated child with safe modes of conveyance and a child safe environment is not cheap.

Anyway DNA test and if pride dictates moving on, move on.

Hard to advise as no idea if you live here or how long you have been with her.

[ludditeman]

2unique, on 2012-02-03 08:48:02, said:

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 07:57:35, said:

What money!
Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

Hahahahaha I'm laughing otherwise I'd be crying as I look back on the emotional, mental and financial drain on resources! Sure if you leave the kid naked in a drawer drinking water but a vaccinated child with safe modes of conveyance and a child safe environment is not cheap.

A Thai lady having a baby in Thai hospital is totally free (apart from optional vitamin tablets, about 250bht for 6 months supply)
Follow ons and vaccinations for the baby are also free.
Milk is provided by the mother, terry nappies are very cheap.

Baby seat for car 1,500bht
Stroller for baby 1,500bht
Baby bed, 1,500bht

What expenses are you thinking of?

Edited by ludditeman, 2012-02-03 17:10:14.

[2unique]

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 17:09:32, said:

2unique, on 2012-02-03 08:48:02, said:

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 07:57:35, said:

What money!
Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

Hahahahaha I'm laughing otherwise I'd be crying as I look back on the emotional, mental and financial drain on resources! Sure if you leave the kid naked in a drawer drinking water but a vaccinated child with safe modes of conveyance and a child safe environment is not cheap.

A Thai lady having a baby in Thai hospital is totally free (apart from optional vitamin tablets, about 250bht for 6 months supply)
Follow ons and vaccinations for the baby are also free.
Milk is provided by the mother, terry nappies are very cheap.

Baby seat for car 1,500bht
Stroller for baby 1,500bht
Baby bed, 1,500bht

What expenses are you thinking of?

My kid just turned four, it certainly hasnt been that inexpensive!

[cdnvic]

One post removed. Try reposting without the profanities. (Misspelling doesn't hide them)

[bangkokburning]

Assuming you are not a troll, you should have been here now long enough to know that there is nothing you can do. So just move on.

[MeMock]

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 17:09:32, said:

2unique, on 2012-02-03 08:48:02, said:

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 07:57:35, said:

What money! Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

Hahahahaha I'm laughing otherwise I'd be crying as I look back on the emotional, mental and financial drain on resources! Sure if you leave the kid naked in a drawer drinking water but a vaccinated child with safe modes of conveyance and a child safe environment is not cheap.

A Thai lady having a baby in Thai hospital is totally free (apart from optional vitamin tablets, about 250bht for 6 months supply) Follow ons and vaccinations for the baby are also free. Milk is provided by the mother, terry nappies are very cheap. Baby seat for car 1,500bht Stroller for baby 1,500bht Baby bed, 1,500bht What expenses are you thinking of?

1,500 baht for a car seat? I would have you up for man slaughter charges if you ended up having a fatal car accident after purchasing something that cheap and nasty to protect your kid.

[cdnvic]

Let's not start arguments here. Please stay on topic.

[deesquared]

You accidentally cared for two living souls.  If you don't care to do that any longer, then just move on.

[fezzy]

move on and count yourself lucky some guys get played for years and lose alot more than money

[Caliguy]

I think you need to call Maury Povich. You'll never get any money back. Don't waste your time.

[Pseudolus]

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 17:09:32, said:

2unique, on 2012-02-03 08:48:02, said:

ludditeman, on 2012-02-03 07:57:35, said:

What money!
Having a baby costs almost nothing here.

Hahahahaha I'm laughing otherwise I'd be crying as I look back on the emotional, mental and financial drain on resources! Sure if you leave the kid naked in a drawer drinking water but a vaccinated child with safe modes of conveyance and a child safe environment is not cheap.

A Thai lady having a baby in Thai hospital is totally free (apart from optional vitamin tablets, about 250bht for 6 months supply)
Follow ons and vaccinations for the baby are also free.
Milk is provided by the mother, terry nappies are very cheap.

Baby seat for car 1,500bht
Stroller for baby 1,500bht
Baby bed, 1,500bht

What expenses are you thinking of?

He says "supported her" not paying the expenses of the baby. I would guess the OP has been chucking her money each month so she could sit at home (his home?) on her arse all day sms'ing her TBF, the baby-dadda. So even taking a low number of 10g a month; 9 months + 5 months baby and mumma (up to 20k?) he's dumped 190k + the bits and bobs moneys she would have bled from him. So all in I reckon 250k would be a better bet. No way to get that money back of course and laughable to think he would.

[impulse]

"She is Thai. i am American. anything i can do?







Take her to court to get the money back.  Then pray the judge doesn't make you pay out until the child is all grown up.  There's a case to be made that you have already claimed the child as your own regardless of paternity tests, simply by providing for the child so far.
Or cut your losses and run, don't walk away.

[sirchai]

. i am American. anything i can do?
Yes. If it's really not your child think about the good times you've had. It isn't the child's fault. Can't you just look for a new girl friend and try it again? A DNA test right after birth would show you enough...

[GentlemanJim]

There are potentially a number of reasons why your g/f could have said the child is not yours, apart from the obvious. Get a paternity test done. As Sirchai rightly says, none of this is the fault of the child. You could sue the mother but it will be the child that suffers.  You have mentioned the financial aspect, but how do you feel? I would be devastated. If what she says turns out to be true, then either you walk away, or if you love your g/f you stay and raise the child as your own. Tough call! Best of luck.