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PeCeDe

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About PeCeDe

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  1. Just a quick note. What I went through is absolutely not for everyone and AA is a great place to start the process. If you think you have PTSD symptoms there's very good tests on the net. Since my diagnosis I've used lot's of VA resources to great effect, here's a great place to start, https://www.ptsd.va.gov/apps/decisionaid/how-can-this-help.aspx I take an SRI religiously. I thank my version of God I found that UK Doctor, both he and my Sister saved my life. So there's always a first step and it has to be you that takes it.
  2. Thanks for the question. Here's a brief recap. I was in the military (Vietnam) but after the war I moved to Canada in disgust over what had happened, then tried to forget. Which consciously I did, but of course you never forget hence my drinking. 30 years later I was in such a mess I had to go to the only person who would help, my sister in the UK. There I accidentally saw a retired British Military Doctor who asked if I'd ever been in the military to which I replied No. He then gave me a questionnaire to fill out, which I scored 100%. Bluntly he told me he thought I was lying. He enrolled me in a UK military PTSD group, that's when the memories started to flood back and after all the years of denial I felt free of the need because the cause had been dealt with.
  3. As most know there are many reasons we can become "alcoholic" or at least behave like one. The AA movement has been a wonderful success around the world and saved many from destruction, it cannot be faulted. That having been said many members can be rather pedantic with "it's our way or no way." My point is there are many reasons we start drinking out of control, one common reason is to forget and if we don't come to terms with the reason, the drinking won't stop, AA or not. In my case I had one damn good reason to forget and was set to kill myself with the stuff until my symptoms were recognized and I came to terms with the problem. This was all done without the aid of AA. I for one had been an AA member for years but the underlying reason was never addressed thus my eventual falling back into my old drinking pattern.
  4. Jeab 1980 does bring up good points. I belonged to an AA group for many years and brought quite a few drunks into the "fold" and then sadly I lost my grip and was gone for six more excruciating years. I had to fly to the UK to get the treatment I needed, got sober again and returned to Canada and to my original AA group only to be greeted by the most obnoxious group of "Told you so's" you could imagine, people I had nursed into sobriety years prior. AA people can be so pedantic and dare I say uncaring and proud of their accomplishments that they forget where they came from and have absolutely no right to criticize.
  5. Is english your first language, because if it is I would guess you're not sober now. I do agree with with what you're saying, but the spelling is a distraction.
  6. Obviously the degree that your psychiatrist had was not worth the paper it was written on. I strongly hold the opposite view to you and our MD's should be amongst the first people we contact when trying to get sober but mainly for advice on who to get help from, because often many hours of one on one or group therapy are needed and an MD is too busy for that. An MD can also recommend programs such as medically supervised withdrawal, if allowed in your country.
  7. My Canadian GP was hot on my trail long before I was ready to admit it. During an annual he noticed my red blood cells were out of kilter, saying alcohol kills red blood cells leaving a predominance of young cells, then he asked how much I drank? To which I answered oh, 2 or 3.. No idea how many in a 750ml bottle of vodka, but you know the story. By the time I got to the UK I was desperate and "finally" outright told my UK Doctor exactly how much, by then one and a half bottles a day, he was ex military and knew right away it was PTSD. If only I'd been honest years previous I'd have saved all kinds of heartaches for myself and those around me... spilt milk, but at least I'm alive now and enjoying life in good ole Thailand.
  8. Just wondered how the OP "Wanderluster" was doing with the "alcohol" thing... Any changes?
  9. Don't think I was specific enough about the "Medically" supervised part of the program I was in, if the OP tries the drug assisted withdrawal method it absolutely has to be done with a physicians help, no exceptions (that's what doctors are there for, to help you, they won't judge). The OP refers to "Semi-Sober" and that is a non-existent state, it's a dream which doesn't exist coming from an alcoholic mind, you're either drunk or sober, take your pick. To me the best reward for sobriety was finding the people who had loved me throughout my and their trials but withdrawn because they couldn't help, and were resigned to watching me die.
  10. The important thing to know about withdrawal from long and excessive use of alcohol is it can be dangerous, just like withdrawal from Benzo's the addict can have dangerous seizures particularly if prone to them and even die if not managed properly. Drug therapy during withdrawal works, I can attest to that. I know the therapy is frowned on in many Countries Canada being one, and I think US as well. However I stopped drinking alcohol in the UK, where there are nurses trained in prescribing Librium therapy for home withdrawal and it is very, very closely monitored, daily in fact. The dosage is high to start with and gradually titrating over a 7 or 10 day period. For me, I felt no withdrawal symptoms and the only problem was I had trouble walking after the therapy for about two weeks. Funny actually. Of course the real work starts afterwards and joining AA or some similar organization is in my opinion absolutely essential, perhaps do that now! The now sober addict has a new life, and has to learn how to "Walk" in his beautiful new shiny world. When I think back, the veil of horrors was finally lifted... And the world is beautiful, it's there to be appreciated.
  11. Agreed. But, there's nothing wrong in having an inherent flaw, type 1 diabetics can't help their health, it came from their parents and parents parents, familial tendencies to cancer also, the same is true of alcoholism, the list is long. But as you say, often what kicks people who have this tendency to alcoholism from regular non-problematic drinkers into practising alcoholics is life's events and continually resorting to alcohol to hide those events or memories whatever they may be, then at some point according to our individual makeup compulsion takes over, and we know the rest. Alternately there are those to whom no "life changing" events happened but they just became alcoholics because they drank themselves over their limit. For example, their are presumably lot's of Mormon alcoholics (perhaps 1 in 10) who don't know it because they don't drink and therefore never reached that limit. Hope this makes sense.
  12. Absolutely agree. My way of expressing that concept is everyone is born with a credit card for alcoholic drinks, some fortunate people get unlimited credit, for some it's zero drinks and yet others maybe 5000, 100,000 etc.but eventually if you drink and don't have unlimited credit on that card you'll become alcoholic. Guaranteed, and no use complaining. The OP is to be commended for looking for help, as they say, that is the first step.
  13. To the OP, you need professional help, not just friendly advice, as has been said, everyone is different. In my case I finally became aware my drinking was a problem was when a Federal guard at a fed building I was entering at 8 in the morning reached over and smelled my breath saying ugh drinking in the morning (but it was from the night before), and she said you need help. for me things came to a head when I was seeing images of a woman in the corner of my room and I could no longer function... Scary. I was in the UK at the time and went to see a Physician there who happened to be a retired military doctor, he took one look at me and gave me a form to fill in, to which he announced I was suffering from PTSD... For thirty odd years I'd drunk excessively (functioning drunk) and finally here was the reason, I was trying to forget my military past which was violent, but I had to face it. I spent six months in counselling with other vets, and came out of that able to function normally without a drink. Now I have one beer when appropriate. I am alcoholic but I appear to need more than one to go into a relapse. Good luck my friend... Just maybe your bad dreams are things you're trying to forget and you're using alcohol to do that.
  14. In case we didn't know, no one starts the day thinking, "Oh, goodie, todays the day I become addicted!" It just happens. As the song says, God dam the pusher man. The addict is not the criminal, those who supply the stuff are. If she's a supplier then she will get what she deserves, but if she's addicted that's a different story. Either way, it's very sad. Destroyed lives, families, relationships, friendships, wealth, all gone in the twinkling of an eye. If those of us who have no addictions were honest with ourselves we should be grateful, because, there, but for the grace of God (or whoever) we all go.
  15. Hi Craig3365, It's only "amazing" because there's a lot of "media grooming" going on, and us westerners are being trained to expect the worst from Muslims, when in fact, surprise surprise, they are normal people just trying to make a living like you and I. I was in NYC on Sept. 11, 01 but far enough away to not be affected, ever since then I've been exposed to all the cr#p coming from whatever source, perhaps 95% of muslims are not radical, but the more hype aimed against them the lower that number will become and more will fight back. The Rohyngia probably never heard of Sept 11, and are just looking for help, and as we've heard from several of the sane people on this forum, they don't have many (if any) friends, mostly due to misconceptions, and are becoming the most vile pieces of human detritus because of our media machine... This is just so wrong, it makes me cry.
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