CharlotteQ

Possible blacklisted? Please help.

149 posts in this topic

ID: 21   Posted

9 hours ago, CharlotteQ said:

Thank you.

Since I didn't know the Thai language well I was pretty much tricked into signing the paper of "confession". And when I presented them the photos of the several abuse my ex inflicted on me, they told me they were just over one year old and won't be sufficient to open a case with. My ex even contacted my native country's embassy in Thailand making sure I had left a country. During that phone call they also informed my mother that I would have trouble re-entering the country. Is it really true? Pretty much the whole time I've been a victim of the abused system.

 

Could you elaborate a little more on how to check if I'm blacklisted pls?

I don't think your embassy would have given any details about you to a random caller.Sounds like bs to me.In my experience Thais don't make good liars,their storys are usually full of holes.And when call them on their bs,another story is presented,then you know it's bs.

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ID: 22   Posted

5 hours ago, BritTim said:

The point @ubonjoe was making is that anything the Thai consulate tells you about your blacklisting status should simply be ignored. They have no knowledge about who is blacklisted. What was in Joe's mind, I think, is that people tend to assume that if you are issued a visa your status must be OK. That is not so. The consulate will issue a visa without checking if you are blacklisted. Indeed, they cannot check. On entry, immigration then does check, and will deny entry and deport you if you are on the list. Any visa you have makes no difference.

 

If there is no stamp in your passport, it is highly unlikely that you are blacklisted. It is sometimes difficult to know if you have been taken to court. That can happen without your presence. For the future, never sign anything in Thailand without a lawyer of your choice or a representative of your embassy present. It is conceivable, though unlikely, that you were blacklisted after your departure. Usually, that is the only way there would be no stamp in your passport.

 

It seems as though your ex boyfriend was pretty vindictive, and was trying to prevent your return. It might be better to have your status checked before trying to visit. Some services charge a fortune to do that, but there are some affordable options.

Thank you Tim.

What happened was, my ex and his family bribed and manipulated many to get away with their crimes. They broke into my hotel room, cuffed me and threw me in the cheapest mental hospital in Bangkok(as I was told by an inmate), despite my protest and request to speak to a lawyer or a family member first. Soon after, someone from the Chinese(my native country) consulate in Thailand called my family, passing on my ex's threat so that my mom would come pick me up and take me home. When I finally got out of the hell hole, I told my mom that I refused to go home until I find justice after all that had happened(the night I was sent to the hospital, my ex and his family and friends raided my room, stealing several of my important belongings). Then the Chinese consulate contacted my mom (clearly after being instructed by my ex to ensure my departure), even suggested to have my drugged and taken on the plane by force. When I finally left the country, feeling defeated that despite my efforts for months I still couldn't resolve my problem, the Chinese consulate called my mom again, asking her if I had returned. They also added that I would have trouble going back to Thailand again, so don't try anything.

 

So I'm very nervous at my chances of returning Thailand. Please understand that it would make a world of difference to me. So should I just ignore their threat and perhaps try and get a tourist visa from the help of a traveling agency?

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ID: 23   Posted

9 minutes ago, BritTim said:

There is no need to explain the full facts. Just tell them you were previously in a relationship which is now over.

Thank you.

But what if they asked me about the purpose of my last one-year long stay on the all-purpose visa? Should I tell them I was working?

 

Also in response to your last comment, you mentioned there are ways to have my status checked. Could you show me how to do that please?

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ID: 24   Posted

7 minutes ago, CharlotteQ said:

So I'm very nervous at my chances of returning Thailand. Please understand that it would make a world of difference to me. So should I just ignore their threat and perhaps try and get a tourist visa from the help of a traveling agency?

IMHO, you are right to be nervous. Usually, threats from Thai men about blacklisting can be ignored. However, your ex clearly has money and influence.

You should be very careful that your ex and his family are not aware of your visit. I think you should also pay a service to check your blacklisting status. Money and influence can get you blacklisted. Use of http://www.thaivisaservice.com/ has been recommended, at a cost of around 3,000 baht.

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ID: 25   Posted (edited)

16 minutes ago, louse1953 said:

I don't think your embassy would have given any details about you to a random caller.Sounds like bs to me.In my experience Thais don't make good liars,their storys are usually full of holes.And when call them on their bs,another story is presented,then you know it's bs.

I want to cry reading your comment.

 

The truth is, my ex and his family had been lying to me constantly during my four years of stay there. Being the logical person that I was, I often confronted my ex about his lies. And being in love with him, I often wished he could come up with a good reason for them. However, he's not a good liar. He could never come up with anything plausible, but even so still denied that he ever lied. It would eventually lead to his frustration and beating me to a pulp.

 

Even at the police station, he and his family constantly lied to me, my mom and the officials to manipulate the truth.

Edited by CharlotteQ
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ID: 26   Posted

2 minutes ago, BritTim said:

IMHO, you are right to be nervous. Usually, threats from Thai men about blacklisting can be ignored. However, your ex clearly has money and influence.

You should be very careful that your ex and his family are not aware of your visit. I think you should also pay a service to check your blacklisting status. Money and influence can get you blacklisted. Use of http://www.thaivisaservice.com/ has been recommended, at a cost of around 3,000 baht.

Thank you so much for the link.

 

Would they be able to tell me if I would be able to get a visa and return to the country without trouble?

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ID: 27   Posted (edited)

13 minutes ago, CharlotteQ said:

Thank you so much for the link.

 

Would they be able to tell me if I would be able to get a visa and return to the country without trouble?

They can tell you whether you are blacklisted. Basically, this means that (all things being equal) you should be allowed to enter when to arrive at the airport in Bangkok.

I could imagine all kinds of unlikely issues that would prevent getting a visa. Maybe, your ex has contacted and bribed someone senior at the Thai consulate you use in China to recognize and block attempts by you to get a visa (or inform him if you try). This is very unlikely, but not totally impossible.

You should treat all posts made in this thread as best attempts to provide advice, recognizing that we can all be wrong. If you stay well away from anyone who might inform your ex about your visit, and verify your blacklisting status first, I would say go for it. We all need to take small risks in life.

Edited by BritTim
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ID: 28   Posted

Very sorry to read of your situation, be strong.   If you feel you are in a threat situation, why return? Time to move on!

 

All the best.

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ID: 29   Posted

37 minutes ago, BritTim said:

They can tell you whether you are blacklisted. Basically, this means that (all things being equal) you should be allowed to enter when to arrive at the airport in Bangkok.

I could imagine all kinds of unlikely issues that would prevent getting a visa. Maybe, your ex has contacted and bribed someone senior at the Thai consulate you use in China to recognize and block attempts by you to get a visa (or inform him if you try). This is very unlikely, but not totally impossible.

You should treat all posts made in this thread as best attempts to provide advice, recognizing that we can all be wrong. If you stay well away from anyone who might inform your ex about your visit, and verify your blacklisting status first, I would say go for it. We all need to take small risks in life.

Already sent the website an email. If no reply I would follow up with a phone call. Thank you and everyone here. I was quite devastated thinking that I couldn't return to Thailand. Now I'm seeing glimpse of hope again :}

 

IF I was blacklisted, does that mean I would have to wait a long period of time before I could go back to Thailand. And if so, how long would I have to wait?

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ID: 30   Posted

1 minute ago, CharlotteQ said:

IF I was blacklisted, does that mean I would have to wait a long period of time before I could go back to Thailand. And if so, how long would I have to wait?

If you are blacklisted, the report you receive should indicate the expiry date. You can be banned for any period up to and including life.

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ID: 31   Posted

35 minutes ago, Rhys said:

Very sorry to read of your situation, be strong.   If you feel you are in a threat situation, why return? Time to move on!

 

All the best.

Thank you so much Rhys.

What my ex did to me was downright cruel and inhumane. What I posted here is merely tips of the ice berg. He and his family literally destroyed my life. I'm suffering from physical and mental illness which are results of their abuse. I even attempted suicide because I found my situation hopeless. My mom, and the rest of my family doesn't fully understand my problems. I feel that I must take matters into my own hand to make things right. That's the purpose of my return to Thailand.  I'm no longer threatened or fear for my own safety as there's hardly anything left of me.

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ID: 32   Posted

When you do return move to an area at the opposite end of Thailand. Call yourself Jean or Elizabeth, whatever and never talk to anyone you meet about your past experience. Thais cannot keep your secrets, tell one and you've told the town

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ID: 33   Posted

9 hours ago, tomwct said:

Sorry for your problems. probably time to return to your country and return to normalcy. Thai men are not made for marriage. That's why Thai women won't marry them.

Do not fully agree...

If you only know the typical Thai Motorbike Taxi driver then ...maybe.

However if you have Thai friends who are educated and work in respectable Jobs you will see many "normal" Thai people.

Yes, the culture is different from the one at "home"...but that doesn't meant that all Thai Man are bad husbands.

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ID: 34   Posted

5 minutes ago, BritTim said:

If you are blacklisted, the report you receive should indicate the expiry date. You can be banned for any period up to and including life.

I see. If that was indeed the case, is there anyway to get around it? For instance, what if I were to marry a Thai citizen then? I suppose the marriage shouldn't be prohibited. Would I be able to return to Thailand with my new marital status?

 

Sorry if it sounds ridiculous. It means a lot to me to get back to Thailand.

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ID: 35   Posted

17 hours ago, Moonmoon said:

Sorry to hear you went thru all these. Hope your next trip to LOS brings you better luck and fortune. :)

 

I guess that she learned what most of Thai women have known for years and that is that most LOS men here are axxholxs.Or she could be a masochist.

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ID: 36   Posted

3 minutes ago, sanukjim said:

I guess that she learned what most of Thai women have known for years and that is that most LOS men here are axxholxs.Or she could be a masochist.

What does LOS stand for?

 

I'm not a masochist. But I did make horrible choices by putting my life in the hand of a guy who's not only a chronicle liar but also a coward who never admits his crimes. In that sense, I'm paying for my dumb mistake now every single day.

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ID: 37   Posted

A couple of questions:

 

1.       he managed to turn the matter around by showing the police photos of his wounds I inflicted on him
So you did molested him?

2.       my native country's embassy in Thailand seems to be bought by my ex
embassy being bought for what, immigration deports or refuses people entry

3a.       when I presented them the photos of the several abuse my ex inflicted on me, they told me they were just over one year old and won't be sufficient to open a case
b. 
would eventually lead to his frustration and beating me to a pulp.
No injuries at the police station though?

4.       the Chinese consulate contacted my mom (clearly after being instructed by my ex to ensure my departure), even suggested to have my drugged and taken on the plane by force
Consulate or embassy?

5.       the Chinese consulate called my mom again, asking her if I had returned.
Why would they do that?      

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ID: 38   Posted

11 hours ago, CharlotteQ said:

Thank you.

Since I didn't know the Thai language well I was pretty much tricked into signing the paper of "confession". And when I presented them the photos of the several abuse my ex inflicted on me, they told me they were just over one year old and won't be sufficient to open a case with. My ex even contacted my native country's embassy in Thailand making sure I had left a country. During that phone call they also informed my mother that I would have trouble re-entering the country. Is it really true? Pretty much the whole time I've been a victim of the abused system.

 

Could you elaborate a little more on how to check if I'm blacklisted pls?

They tried to get me to sign one of these when a thai hit me on my bike..nope--nada--never..dont

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ID: 39   Posted

1 minute ago, FritsSikkink said:

A couple of questions:

 

1.       he managed to turn the matter around by showing the police photos of his wounds I inflicted on him
So you did molested him?

2.       my native country's embassy in Thailand seems to be bought by my ex
embassy being bought for what, immigration deports or refuses people entry

3a.       when I presented them the photos of the several abuse my ex inflicted on me, they told me they were just over one year old and won't be sufficient to open a case
b. 
would eventually lead to his frustration and beating me to a pulp.
No injuries at the police station though?

4.       the Chinese consulate contacted my mom (clearly after being instructed by my ex to ensure my departure), even suggested to have my drugged and taken on the plane by force
Consulate or embassy?

5.       the Chinese consulate called my mom again, asking her if I had returned.
Why would they do that?      

1.No. I bit him in self-defense.

2.I'm not sure. His family bribed the police. I assume the Chinese consulate in Thailand is now helping them due to their eagerness to get me out the country.

3.That was weeks after the domestic abuse. I was thrown in a hospital for weeks before the police station.

4.I'm sorry I'm not clear on the difference between the two. Chinese embassy in Thailand is what they call it there.

5.Exactly. They really wanna make sure I left the country. But why, other than my ex wants to know.

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ID: 40   Posted

9 hours ago, dbrenn said:

There are many nice Thai men who are very devoted husbands and fathers. A minority do have problems with controlling their tempers, as do a minority of Thai women - take a look at how some of the bar girls behave to their husbands.

 

Then again, there are lots of violent people back home too.

Do you have any evidence to believe that domestic violence affects only "a minority" of Thai families or is that just wishful thinking that makes you feel better.  The one Thai research paper that I have read on the subject estimated that 40% of Thai families experience domestic violence.  While that would be a "minority" it is nevertheless a huge number by the standards of Western countries, about 25% higher than in the US, for example.

 

The Thai estimate accords with my awareness of the problem among Thai families of whom I have some direct knowledge.

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